This weekend has been amazing. Yes, I was nervous and scared and nervous beyond belief, but he made it all okay. Somehow. I don't know how he does it. I mean he didn't take away all my nerves but he definitely made me feel better than I could imagine. I feared that I would have to leave his place and go to my brother's house out of nervousness or maybe I would get on his nerves or maybe I would do something embarrassing. I was hanging out with this other person all day at a point and he got frustrated with me/my indecisiveness. I could hear it in his voice. I wanted to cry (hypersensitive me). All I have ever wanted was to be liked, maybe even loved. This new one didn't make me cry, he made me smile. And if things change between us I hope that it's not cause something went wrong but because we decided it, mutually, amicably. I am going to try and think positively about it from here on out.
I realize that this blog is still not what I want it to be, but I swear that at some point I'll go back to writing beautiful and raw posts that actually make people think instead of saying, "why did I just read all of this?"
Cement water
bright bulbs
freezer air
comfortable silence
red blocks
tiny ants
long kisses
peaceful thoughts
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